Lets talk about sex

Apart from just not being attracted to you…

[Eh, I’ve dated worse].

one obvious reason a woman won’t sleep with you is that she doesn’t want to be a “slut” or a sexual object. Eons of sexual and social oppression doesn’t disappear in a matter of decades.

[Sorry, ladies, but this just ain’t gonna cut it].

I have many strong, sexually liberated friends, two or three of whom claim to have been with close to a hundred men each [presumably not at the same time]. But even the toughest amongst them still winces at words like “slut”, “whore”, and “ho”. They’re smart enough to know that no intelligent man would ever degrade a woman for her sexual choices. But it’s not just the word or who it’s coming from, it’s what it means – undesirable as anything else.

[Professor fiddy says “can’t make a ho a housewife.” He also tweets “My grandma pregnant again trying to talk her out of keeping it” (not sure how that last part applies, but I don’t want to silence his genius)].

Obviously any man who uses these words or believes such an adage is an insecure p*ssy that no self-respecting woman would want, but it still creates an environment of fear for many girls. That judgment by others for doing something could prevent you from finding a desirable mate in the future is one of many reasons that a lot of girls follow a different adage: “keep it like a golf score”.

Too many offers

It’s only natural for you, when you go out to a bar, to look at us as conquests and objects. There are exceptions, of course, but the man asking the question wanted to know why women wouldn’t bone him, so, addressing him, I think I’m safe in my generalization. The truth is that, when we go out, there is a constant stream of dudes vying to feel us from the inside.

[Sexual harassment Panda gets all the ladies cause he knows how to respect boundaries].

If a woman is insecure, she may enjoy the attention, but ultimately, it’s exhausting. It’s nice to feel sexually attractive, but after guy after guy talks to her breasts, tries to touch her face [Ed. Note: Do not ever touch a stranger’s face], or asks her back to his place, one starts to feel degraded and worthless. No one goes to a bar to meet their soul mate, but try to remember that even if the girl you’re chatting up is the first girl you’ve seen all night, you’re likely the tenth guy that day who has tried to bang her. It gets old. Even as a man in your horny prime, it would start to take a toll if roles were reversed.

[In the immortal words of Milhouse “I’m a human [girl] I have feelings"].

As such, sex has a value. For golddiggers and other professional whores the value is monetary, but for the rest it is emotional. Women who withhold sex do so to get something out of it. For some, it is simply an assurance that you actually have to talk to us and recognize our values as complete human beings. For other, sadder people, it is the basis of how they form entire relationships (often marriages…sick, poorly-founded marriages). Finding more liberated women who only want you for the night is not impossible. As social mores change, it is an increasingly easy task. But for many of us, the remnants of past oppression linger, and the desire to be seen completely takes on an increased significance with every cocktail thrown our way and…well…we’re not giving it up without a fight.