After two weeks off for a visiting Briton and a drunken holiday extravaganza, I found our email box flooded with two messages! One of which was even a question pertaining to the subject matter of this blog! Lets dive in. This week's question comes from a man who didn't want his name used. So we'll call him Anon E. Mous. Not to be confused with his cousin Don E. Most.
[What's that? No one reading this is old enough to get this reference? Fuck you. Maybe I think you watch too much TV Land]
Anyway Anon writes the following:
My main problem in finding a girl is that I can't find anyone I really want to be with for more than a few hours. An attractive, sane, fun girl who likes all the same stuff I do.
Welcome to dating, dude. The whole point is to meet as many people as possible until you find that one that you can actually put up with for the long haul. That being said, I think it couldn't hurt to talk about realistic standards. I have a hunch you may be too harsh a judge.
When I was in high school, I dreamt of someday marrying an attractive, independently wealthy Ph.D. and part-time comedian who was half-Irish, half-Italian, and raised in the UK so he'd have their dry wit. Oh, and he wouldn't mind being a stay-at-home dad so I could fulfill my dreams of becoming a doctor. These types of expectations may be why I didn't get a prom date (well, that or the acne, beer gut, and social leprosy...it's a toss up).
My standards today at 26?
1. Born a man2. Not crazy3. Literate4. Not a fan of Entourage or Spike TV5. Theoretically Employable
So why have my requirements for a mate dropped off so sharply in the last decade? Is it cynicism? Crushing loneliness? The realization that I'm no picnic?
No. Just recognition of the fact that no one is perfect, that few of us can actually find someone who perfectly fits our romantic ideal, and the fact that I don't want to end up a middle-aged woman who enters her cat in feline fashion shows.
[I wonder if there were any women in attendance who did not have eggs frozen]
No one wants to have to settle, but everyone has to make certain concessions. The major things that you need to be happy have to be there - i.e. you have to agree on children, financial and career goals, where to live etc. - but let go of some of the smaller things. A lot of you out there just need to come to terms with this and lower your standards a little.
[So she opens ketchup bottles with her teeth. It's an IHOP for Christ's sake, not Morton's]
That will be our focus this week on TWWOW, realistic standards. Get ready, reader, this is gonna be a 3-fer.
Love it. I can't seem to find any supermodel's with PhD's that eat like a mechanic named Bubba so I've lowered my standards to a woman who can accept the fact that 70% of the things I say aren't funny but laughs anyways and can open a ketchup bottle with her teeth. Is that too much to ask?
ReplyDeleteDoable. Totally doable.
ReplyDelete